Love letter in December

by - 5:00 AM

This is a love letter of sorts to him and to myself.

I am finally strong enough to write this. I won't send this to you because even if I did you wouldn't understand and you would find it troublesome. But I still want to and this is what I hope to have the strength to tell you one day.

You are nearly an adult and you're going to have to step into this cruel twisted world. The world is not a pretty place with many pretty faces with empty hearts however you are special, so innocent and so loved.           

You are intelligent and resistant and have overcome so much with groundness and strength. I know you carry so much on your shoulders and I know that you're going to become a brilliant and hard working guy which is why I'm so glad that I had the oppurtunity to get to know your humble heart and cheekiness at the eptiome of your youth.

I was lucky to meet you when there are those who transverse the world however will never get to meet the boy that I have. The memories with you are selfish treasures I wouldn't trade anything for. I wouldn't replace meeting you with anyone, these feelings for you are something that are truly truly only mine. It has brought a lot of happieness and a lot of suffering but I would still want to meet you again and again a million times at the same time and same place and replay our film over and over again.

I'm not sure when or how or why but admist the late nights and cheap alcohol I realised I have sort of fallen in love with you. My whole mind is consumed by you, constantly, and I wonder if you are happy. I hope that you are.

I think about you so much and the worst thing is I can't help it. Sometimes I believe I want to forget but truly I never would want to.

I'm not sure when but you became the world to me. That is why, while you are still young, carefree and confused with true feelings of first love I sincerely hope that you find an angel. I hope you find one that makes you smile simply when you hear her name. I hope she looks at you the way I do, and only you. Cherishes you past your money, your looks and all that fades in time and treats you like your the only person in her life because if such a dream came true I would never let you go.

I'm not sure why we fall in love with those who hurt us. And why I hurt those that love me but the truth is that we simply do. Despite this, I would want to fall in love with the people I have over and over again.

I hope I find someone that I love as much as I love him and I never have to let him go. I hope that you, also, find you angel that never leaves you.

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